Monday, September 8, 2008

Second helping

Raunchy bluesy guitar staggers under shots of buxom ladies felating chicken strips and pouring gasoline over their tight t-shirts.

Two of the girls brandish carpet knives at each other while the rest of the ladies growl: vrOOOM vrOOOOM vrOOOM.

A picture of Steven Stegall flashes on the screen almost inperceptively:
Two men sit back to back at separate tables of a fancy restaurant.

One of the men, a man with a large belt buckle and a ten gallon hat signals for the waiter.

Man: Bring me the meanest, most-low down, dog-beatin' barbecue sauce on the menu.

Waiter: Why certainly, sir.

The waiter returns and pours the sauce, careful to hold his hand over the bottom of the label.

The man behind him, a courtly looking aristocrat wearing a tuxedo and a glued on mustache, stops the waiter.

Man: Yes...fetch me the finest, most-exquisite, premium barbecue sauce on the menu.

Why sir i have it right here.

The waiter shifts his hand to cover the top of the label and pours then walks away.

The 2 men each take a bite and exclaim in unison: This is delicicous!

The waiter in the back giggles slyly and reveals the bottle for the camera:
Over his shoulder, and out of focus, the 2 men are having sex discreetly on one of the tables.

Oh Chris Parnell, thank you for making SNL almost watchable.

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